and left frustrated. The developmental pediatrician tried hard not to dismiss my concerns. She said some occupational therapy couldn't hurt. She thinks J is just 'intense'. What she means is high spirited on the verge of ADHD, but I just don't know. Then, I asked again about his sleep issues. The melatonin is working wonders going to sleep, but again it's not meant to keep someone asleep. She said to give him a little more to see if it at least keeps him asleep more than 2 hours. She then told me to get him out of my bed. That this is best for him. Developmentally, maybe. Adoptive attachment wise, I'm not convinced. All the research I've done and all the connections I've had with other adoptive families with kids with attachment issues reinforces to me that sleep is not something you mess with. His cry when I try to get him to stay in my room is so sad and I just can't force him to sleep by himself. He really does need me. I don't know that those outside of adoption can understand the trauma kids in adoption go through and some just don't adjust like the majority do. Some just need a little more for a little longer and I feel that that's my job to love him through this hard time he's having. It doesn't help that his speech is delayed and he can't voice his issues to me.
My frustration is definitely not with J. I'm frustrated that I don't feel able to help him sometimes and I want to so badly. I pray she's right. I pray that with time we'll see these huge strides in his emotional and social development. I hope because that's all I have left now that we've ruled everything out except speech, which I am working on. I love this little man of mine.
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