Beautiful Days

I'm taking comfort, today, in the notion and belief that there are beautiful days ahead always. This is the belief that gets me through anything or has in the past.  I try not to think about what may or may not happen so much.  Try is the key word.

I've been trying to get some help for our ADHD child.  We have a backup prescription ready for the first time in 7 years of dealing with this.  We're still going to give the vitamins more time.  He's only been on them for 1 week, so hopefully we'll see some changes.  I've had a lengthy phone conversation with the school counselor and she has assured me that all of the kids in his grade are having major transition issues.  She did at least tell me that he can stop Spanish class at semester and take ASL next year as his foreign language.  If he feels he needs to give up, I think I'm going to let him.  He's such a visual learner and even with our help is struggling.  ADHD gets better as they get older in some ways, but there's always something new with it that they have to learn to deal with.  I'm hoping we can stay off meds, but I'm not ruling it out either.  I have a call into the coordinator for special services to have them test his reading/writing ability to make sure there's nothing else going on after speaking to another specialist today.

My little many's behavior has, in many ways, gotten worse over the last week or so.  I didn't feel any choice but to call around to see how we can help him further.  The development ped in April only found him to have mild expressive speech delay, but was unsure about his behavioral oddities.  I have an email to her nurse to make sure she doesn't think anything of him still having the same tendencies, with no real changes, now that he's 3.  3 is such a magic number.  In so many ways they seem older and really into the throws of toddlerhood instead of infant, but he almost seems more trapped there.  My cuddly little boy still doesn't quite know how to make friends or look at me, consistently, when I talk to him.  There are seldom long gazes.  But at 3, I can get him help.  So, the school is also supposed to call me back about evaluating him.  My guess is still on the spectrum of Aspergers.  I confirmed my mother in law, who has a daycare, thought the same thing.  If we can get him evaluated by the school then we can get some help from a great center for special needs. 

So as I talked to several specialists in several areas and described two of my boys, I teared.  Not all in out crying, but tears as I realized in my words there were so many truths that I so badly don't want to believe, but I do.  I hurt for them both and hope they will be okay, mostly socially.  I love my children with a passion that makes it hurt that much more when I have fears about them.  So, I sit back, take a deep breath and decide that another beautiful day is coming and they will be okay.