So where are you on Christmas?

Other than one thing I have to wait on, I'm done, done, done!  As soon as Walmart ships and receives the rest of what grandpa bought, I can wrap that and be done with that too.  Tonight I had to stop there to get our groceries and toiletries and pick up our site-to-store order...one of them.  I didn't realize how big the thing was!  Luckily, I folded down one of the van seats and shoved it in.  Then, poor, Brian had to put it in our closet until I get time to put it together before Christmas.  And after I put it together I still have to hide it 'til then.  This is grandpa's gift to my two littles.  I ordered one of those Radio Flyer wagons with the foldable handle and seatbelts and cup holder....like their own little car.  I'm hoping it will come in handy on trips to the zoo and such instead of carrying them.  They're both getting to heavy, but Chelsi's short little legs just don't go very far very fast and Jaemin is still pretty wobbly on the walking.

This ought to be fun to put together, huh?

Lisa

Word of the Day: Erupt

I'm going to start a new category titled "Word of the Day".  From now on when the kids use words a little incorrectly, I'm going to post it under this category and explain how they used it.  'Cause it's always funny!

Tonight's word is erupt.  As in "Kaelin you're erupting me".  This was when Chelsi was reading her book tonight and apparently,  Kaelin was whispering in her ear as she read.  This was "interrupting" Chelsi's reading.

Of course, this from the girl who, earlier tonight, asked daddy if "buttmunch" was a bad word.  Dad politely explained that it's not BAD, but it's something nice girls should say.   To which she promptly replied "mommy says it".  I admit it....I do.  There's worse, right?

Lisa

What a nice day for mommy and son

Our attorney called me at work and gave us a court date to finalize J.  So, right before Christmas we should have him a legal member of our family.  While, some would argue that he was already a member of our family when we met, it's true.  But, there is an indescribable feeling you get when someone who is appointed to uphold the law prounounces you legally your child's family with all the rights and privileges that come along with it.  Just hearing them say that we must agree " to love him as our own", etc., etc. is a very emotional moment.  I have never gotten teary when my 3 youngest arrived.  But, put me in that court room I get teary eyed every time the judge has set the gavel down with this decision.  I love finalization day and it IS important to me.

Tonight, J wouldn't let me out of his sight for some reason.  Maybe he knew and sensed how happy mommy was feeling because of that call?  I put him on my back, in the Ergo, so I could do dishes and he was as content as can be.  He usually wants Cole to come get him and take him downstairs to play, but this time he was content with mommy.

Later we were sitting around and I asked him if he wanted his socks on and he very clearly said "uh uh" and shook his whole body no.  I asked him another question that I knew he would say yes to and he very purposefully nodded yes.  Every time I asked him if he wanted socks on he would shake his whole body.  So much so, that I had to video it because it was so cute and definitely something I always want to remember.

How could I possibly have been blessed so much to have this child in my life and having the amazing and awesome privilege of being his mother.

Lisa

SAHM vs. Working Mom

Age old discussion, that on some boards become more than a discussion.  I shouldn't really say age old since the dawn of working moms isn't really that old in the scheme of things.  Though I think even back when a working mother was not common it existed out of necessity.  Wars, single parenting etc. made it a must.  Then you had a women's movement when feminists pushed it further to make it more of a right for women to choose to work and not necessarily do it out of necessity for the family.

Granted there are lots of women in the world who choose career and work because they need to and want to.  I don't mean need as in they will be on welfare without, I mean need for their soul and identity.  Yes, I believe this is a feeling women have, but I am not one of those.  I am a work out of necessity mom/woman.  When I am at work, I work hard and put out all effort to earn my pay, but when I'm home, I'm home and work doesn't need to exist.  I don't have the greatest paying job either, but it's enough for the bills and allows me to be with my family when I need to without feeling major guilt, so fairly low stress, when you consider the importance of family.

Would I be SAHM if I could....sure.  I would LOVE to work part-time to have both worlds, but that isn't possible.  We would have to have no house payment or anything in order to afford it and that's just not possible.  Our house payment isn't even $1,000 so we're not one of those maxed out families either...so please don't think we're just living above our means like a lot of America.

We all make these decisions with what we have to work with in life, not necessarily what we want.  However, we go on and make the best of what we have.  The thing that bugs the crap out of me is when you get on any sort of mommy board you will find mostly SAHMs....which is fine in and of itself.  BUT, if I hear (read) one more time about how they chose to stay home no matter the sacrifice because "raising" their own child is best or similar statements I'm going to blow and speak my mind.  I get tired of some thinking that every working mom chooses it and actually has that choice.  When, in reality, I personally know they are the wife of a business owner, doctor, lawyer, etc. and I know they're just fine.

First of all, "I" am raising my children working or not.  We decide what to do with them and how to raise them and no one else does.  Yes they go to daycare, but it's not that long in the day, any longer than a school day, and we make the decisions that impact them.  And when the end of the day arrives WE spend every second with our children.  We don't hire babysitters and go out or ship them off to grandmas (though they'd probably like that if we did).  We want every second with them that we can get since we don't have the option to stay at home.  We make the best of our situation.

So, be thankful if you're able to stay at home.  Because some of us already have as little as you can, we don't have a cleaning lady to cut and a $40 cable bill isn't going to allow me to stay home either.  No loans, other than house, so what's left?  And please quit cutting at working moms!  Please quit making hurtful comments that boost your own ego making you feel like the best mom in the world.  We're all doing the best we can!

If you are a SAHM that doesn't make these comments and does feel thankful, and I know plenty exist, please ignore.  This is aimed at specific comments I've read all too often over the past years on boards I'm a part of.

Lisa

My new ornament

Since the big boys had "my first Christmas" ornaments I decided Jae needed one too.  I loved this one right away.  It looks like my baby boy....don't ya think?

I think I need a New Years resolution for 2010

I'd never stick to it like most New Year's resolutions, but it would be nice.

I want to be able to leave things be.....

I want to be able to not rethink every little thing I do and continue rehashing it in my head whether I can change it or not.  Just accept it and go on.  Every time I buy something, say something or do something I rethink it.  Maybe if I hadn't bought that my budget wouldn't have scared me so much this month.  Did I say that as nice as I could have or did I say something or get as excited about something for someone as I should have?  I would like to be a little easier on myself from time-to-time.  I am definitely my own worst critic.

I would like to be able to let things go with the kids misbehave or get off-track a bit.  Not give them a speech for one low paper and remember Bs are find and it doesn't mean they won't get into college just because they're capable of As, but get Bs.  Let them have a chance to be responsible for their own grades without constantly feeling like I have to remind them of where they are in the quarter.  I am doing a little better on that, but it's difficult.

I would just like it if I were a little more laid back and able to have fun and enjoy life just a little bit more and quit worrying over every little thing and how those small things are going to affect my life down the road.  I'd like to let that stuff go.

I need to let all of this go so I can enjoy the now and not worry about the then so much.  Worrying a little is fine, but I can worry to extreme, though I have been working on this and have gotten a little, itsy bit better.

This is a lot of work for a Type A person, so pray for me PLEASE!  :)

Lisa

Some archived photos from Korea

I've had these photos saved since we left Korea.  I had hoped to find their families and I did find two of them.  So, I thought I'd go ahead and put the pictures of the girls and I visiting the babies at the Holt Reception Center in May.  These babies either didn't have foster families yet or were waiting for their families and living their during their entire wait.  These babies are well loved and there was no doubt how well taken care of they were by the house mothers.



The little guy here has been waiting for quite some time.













The babies below were under 5 months old.  The younger ones are in a whole separate room.





I held this little girl, below, for quite a while.  She REALLY loved being held.