Someone is 50

 Someone turned 50 today!  And I pulled off my first surprise party for him. I was able to grab plenty of snack for pickup and delivery from Walmart and Gerbes and then sneakily tell him my dad and sister were coming for a small Thanksgiving snack night thing. This threw him off. He just thought I over bought until people kept trickling in. He finally asked who was coming and I told him that was the surprise. It was really just close friends and family but that came to about 40 without kids. So good to see everyone and so glad everyone celebrated with us. 

Recycle Decor

 Recycle when you can. 

Anyone who knows me knows I hate to waste money or things.  So when I’m ready for a change in decor I think long and hard.  In this case, I wanted to minimize the colors I had in my living room. This means new pillows or throws.  Well, as luck would have it I found the perfect pillow covers on Amazon. I took those green pillows and turned them dark grey to match a throw I had.  They fit perfect and look perfect.  And best of all they cost $10 total and I didn’t have to sell or throw out the old pillows. 

Make the best of these times

 

I missed that game because an adult kid was home for a visit. The choices we sometimes have to make having kids and especially when they move away. But the youngest daughter definitely makes the best of everyday and all times.  Slow down. The best is still to come. 

Love these girls, so much, getting ready for pajama night at the the game. The stands hadn’t even filled up yet. 

Keep muddling

 

Keep pushing.  Keep muddling through if you have to. Life is easier in small bites. Don’t procrastinate and end up creating more work and anxiety for yourself.  Truly this works. Now I’d only my kids would take note!  

Can I? Should I?

Choices in parenting are hard!  They don’t always have to be. There are definitely things you can do to make life easier as a parent. Organize your week and take offers to help are just a couple. 

But sometimes parenting is just hard and you can’t press the easy button. You can’t just let kids have whatever they want because it keeps the peace at the moment and because you have the money to do so. They need to see you stand your ground and be firm. And then to in a lot of situations know why you made that choice for them. And yes I mean for them. When they’re younger they do not have the capacity to make all of their own decisions. You are there until their brain matures to make those for themselves. You are there to teach them along the way. It’s a long 20+ year process.  Think about it in the context of the things you do for them, regardless of financial abilities, are small when they’re younger but they grow with the child’s age  and bailing them out of trouble or continually buying them what they want just because you can will cause them to potentially get into trouble regardless of consequences or have no real regard and respect for  money or people.

Teach by example. Talk out loud, at the diner table, about the choices the family is making. Let them see you and hear you talk about somewhat hard stuff. Let them hear you say I can’t because of xyz even though I want to. And then teach them to ask themselves can I.  And not just can I, should I. Just because you physically can doesn’t mean you should. 

Ask the hard questions. Teach them to ask the hard questions of themselves and be honest with themselves. Teach them to fish!

A little laugh for the week

 To say this week has been stressful at work is an understatement. I was in tears last night feeling the pressure (put on myself) to know more than I should know after 7 days on the job.  I literally prayed that God would show me a sign that this was really the right place for me. I so badly want to prove to myself I CAN handle this role but if it’s wrong it’s wrong. I walked in, put my stuff in my office and went to get my water for the day and ran into the director in the hall. She asked how things were going. Me being my truthful self told her it was quite the learning curve after being somewhere for over 20 years, growing up with an organization and therefore being an expert of the material. She looked at me and said “you always had to have an A didn’t you?”  I answered truthfully.  Yes.  She told me to get past that. It’s fine. She said they hired me because of my experience.  And then later my manager told me he was having a conversation with someone else in the office that told him they won getting me to make the move. That was my sign. I can go on now and push forward as hard as I have been since I started. 

Over the weekend I got the pants I had ordered to go with a top that I can now fit in again. I ordered a 28. The tag in the pants and on the pants said 28. My husband just burst out laughing. Not making fun of anyone larger. Just funny that even the tags were so wrong. 

Onward to more learning and catching up with a lot of information in the coming weeks, months and years!

Piecing it all together

 

I hadn’t felt tired, out of place or uncomfortable in a very long time. Yes the occasional I’m new to a parent group for a school function or something like that but not that new kid to school anxious feeling.  Not in quite awhile. 

I’ve definitely been feeling that these past several days, every day. Despite everyone being very warm and kind, newness at this age especially makes you feel something you likely haven’t felt in a long time. But getting the collage I had made up makes my office feel warm and me and that makes me feel safe in my place.  Until I feel safe and comfortable everywhere I will be running 100 mph to get up to speed on as much as I can.  I’m used to knowing so much and I need to give myself sometime to feel an ounce of that security here. And I’ll have to keep reminding myself.  Sometimes several times a day when I have a second to breath.  I can do this!