Easter Family #1

Every Easter, like Christmas, you have to squeeze in multiple family gatherings.  Easter's not quite as bad, but we have both grandparents to see.  So Easter Saturday evening is spent with Brian's mom and dad.  The kids had a good time and got their Easter eggs hunted.  She doesn't do candy.  It's usually a box of snacks of some sort for each kid, a couple of toys and $5 ($1 in 5 eggs).  They're color coded eggs, so you know that each kid ends up with the right prizes.

I had to keep this picture.  Normally, I delete them if they just end up being head shots and they're not really doing anything, but with a 14 year old you rarely get them in a picture anyways.

Chase stopped hunting for eggs for a second to get this tree frog off the tree for inspection.  What a nature
boy!

Kaelin got a hoola hoop and boy can she use it.

And here are the little kids.

No pullup?

Chelsi has decided to go without a pullup.  She wanted to keep her potty alarm on though.  I think it makes her feel safe that she can't pee too much and she'll get caught.  But, it hasn't gone off at all in weeks.  She hasn't had a week where she's peed more than once in several weeks.  Definitely a great investment for the family.  $100 for the device or at least $15-20/month in pullups. 

She was all smiles going to bed for the very first time in her life without a pullup on!

Such a tear jerker

http://news.yahoo.com/video/us-15749625/paralyzed-bride-jennifer-darmon-walks-at-wedding-24948127

It's only about a minute long video, but I have to say it brought tears to my eyes.  They are starting off their marriage very strong. I know, first hand, the amount of strength and courage it takes on both sides for what they're getting through.  It sounds horrible, but it's extremely true, that when these sorts of injuries take place within just a couple of years a lot of couples split up....married or not.  He stayed with her when he didn't have to and promised to by asking her to marry him.  A lot of character for him.  And her strength?  You cannot deny that someone who has that sort of injury and learns to walk again, if only for the isle, has a tremendous amount of inner strength and resolve...as did Brian.

Married couples have a lot to get through in their marriages, but this is a trial unlike most.  Maybe on par or right under if one gets cancer.  Very life changing for both, to say the least.

Fishing for Minnows

The big boys got a very small, 2 gallon, fish tank for Christmas this year.  They tried their hand a couple of different fish and nothing lasted more than a few days.  So, we were letting the tank sit because sometimes fish do better after that point.  Now, 3 months later we're getting some algae and definitely a seasoned tank. 

Since they LOVE to catch minnows and such and bring them home, I thought maybe they could put some in the tank and we'd just keep them instead.  We only have one as of tonight.  They didn't do so well as there were other people around the lake.  Jaemin did get to play with a frog and touch a tadpole though.  The tadpole has even already grown it's legs.  Jaemin wasn't too keen on the frog though.  It jumped and scared him...yeah Mr. Tough Guy.....and he told us to put it back.  I asked him to hold it, so he grabbed it from me and threw it back into the lake.  I don't think he cared for it.

It was a nice break from rushing in the evening.  I fixed supper, left it to simmer on the stove and we left. We came back just 1/2 hour later, took showers and enjoyed the food.  And boy were they all hungry after that.

Sleep for Donuts

After 7 full months of sleeping with me, on me, in my bed, Jaemin slept all night in his own bed.  I refuse to let him cry this out.  It's not worth it.  With his acid reflux he has a lot of gagging issues and when he cries really hard he pukes.  And then with his reflux he's so used to swallowing that kind of gunk that he swallows it and I'd be afraid he's aspirate it and end up with it in his lungs like he used to.  Not worth it!

I at least want him to fall asleep in his own bed though.  I don't care as much that he comes in for comfort if he wakes in the night, but not to start out there or wait until I go to bed and then come in.  Literally, that's what it's come to.  We can put him down at 8 and he'll lie there quietly until I tip toe past to go to bed.  Then, it's a fight...at 10 or 11 at night.  I can't do it anymore.  I'm too tired for that.  He sleeps great when he's in my bed, but he's got to go to sleep in his. 

We've been bribing him with donuts for about a week now.  I bought his favorite little gem donuts on sale this week and he LOVES them.  So, I thought surely he would sleep in his bed for a donut in the morning.  All yesterday he was clapping for the donuts he would get this morning.  He would tell us he was going to sleep in 'my room'.  YAY!  Not mommy's room.  YAY!  But, by nightfall we asked him if he was going to sleep in his bed all night, in his room and he politely told Brian 'no thank you'.  It was the cutest thing, but we'd taken a huge leap backwards in the bed war.  So at bedtime, which is later on weekends, we put him to bed.  I'd cooked all day yesterday, for Easter since I don't have time this week, and was exhausted early.  So I decided to go ahead and sneak off to bed.  He'd been quiet for awhile, so I thought maybe he was sleeping.  Nope.  I get to my room and I could hear him running down the hall.  So we started the war at 9:30 and it ended about 11.  I won this time.  I put him in his bed and sat outside his room so that every time he got out of bed I could direct him back into bed.  I eventually went to bed as he was starting to get drowsy.  He followed after a bit, but after a couple of times of walking him back to his room I no longer had to get up.  I could just tell him he was not sleeping in my bed, he was sleeping in his bed and he needed to go back to his room.  He did this several times and was done for the night.  He really hardly even cried when I told him to go to his room.  I could hear the pouty 'huh huh' as he walked back, but that was it.

This morning I went to his bed and woke him up.  I told him how big he was and that he was going to get his donuts.  He was THRILLED to get up this morning.  He ate and ate and ate.  He's already saying he'll sleep in his bed tonight.  But, as we learned last night what we think in the morning is not necessarily what we're thinking at night when the time comes.  And before anyone thinks Brian didn't try to help in this, I asked him not to.  This has been my war with Jaemin.  It was always me he wanted.   It wasn't my bed.  I slept in his room two nights ago on his floor by his bed and he got up several times to lay on the floor with me.  He's a mommy snuggler that for sure.

My donut boy!

Long day of shopping with great rewards

I 'made' the big boys go with me shopping today.  Unfortunately, I had to do my monthly shopping and weekly groceries at once...which meant a massive list!  I was also planning on returning stuff to Kohls and checking the price on diapers at Target since I'd be out that way...oh and stop by the $1 store.  The first parts were all a bust!  I forgot my Kohls return, so the boys got out of that.  The diapers that were on sale at Target weren't as good a deal as they seemed online, but the Target brand WAS cheaper than Walmart's brand, so I got them.  I found a couple of things for little man to get from the Easter Bunny and then he can bring them on vacation with us.  All good there.

Then we were off to Walgreens to get some dental floss...real cheap.  Yep, I walked out of there with just the dental floss.  After that it was some items at Kroger, but only what was on the list from the ad.  Only if super cheap.  But, we stocked up on some cheap chips for the trip.  Last stop was Walmart.  That was a large bill, but for a month of toiletries, etc and 1 week of food it was good.

I actually came in real great on my budget today.  Surprised me with how over full the cart was.  I could barely push it after we put 20 lbs of dog food on the bottom too.  I made my lists at home and then searched for all the coupons I didn't already have.  Of course, I always print extra if I think there's a chance I might use it down the road.  Saved me $16 on everything I was buying anyways.  See we don't live in an 'extreme coupon' area where you get double dolllar coupons, triple any coupons, etc.  So, you have to be happy with this.  Plus when you're buying fresh fruits and veggies and NO processed foods it's a little harder...but I don't care.

My best deal was $3 off a Toy Story Operation game that was on clearance for $5.  Do I need it?  No, but I cut the coupon thinking it would be a great Christmas or birthday present for one of the younger ones.  So, yep, I got it for $2.  Cole used comp ads to get the donuts he wanted to buy himself for $1.09 each.  I told him I'd never seen them that cheap and he buys his own junk food, so he used my ad.  He also used a coupon I found for B1G1 Axe shower gel.  He got two for $3.  He was pretty happy with his deals, so this was a GREAT teaching opportunity.

After I got home and put all the stuff away little man woke up from his nap.  He was SO happy to see me and gave me a big 'hi mommy'.  Then, I sat down on the couch and he monkey hugged me (this is what I call it when he wraps hi arms around my neck and legs around my waist) and kept rubbing and squeezing his hands on my.  I asked him what he was doing and he kind of gave me the duh answer of 'I hugging you'.  I've never heard that from him and it was so sweet.  As in 'I love you' sweet.  Man that boy makes a tired mom feel good!  Love you Jaemin!

kiss it mommy

Just 3 months ago Jaemin was barely stringing two words together.  Every great once in awhile we'd get 3 small ones.  Now he talks CONSTANTLY!

Tonight it was "ouch, that hurt", "kiss it mommy".  And when I was done I got a big "thank you".  Way sweeter than the big ones.  And they wonder why he's my favorite kid.  ;)

Just kidding guys.

Lisa

Halleluja!

I'm in bed by 10 and Jae is ASLEEP in HIS bed. No early fight tonight..... And I almost gave in and gave paci back. That's how bad last night was. Amen!

So yeah, we're lucky

But it's still d@^^ frustrating that we have to deal with the repercussions of the injury.  I honestly get VERY annoyed when people tell me how lucky we were with Brian and his spinal cord injury.  I know they mean well, but it's not like I don't know it.  I'm reminded almost everyday.  Trust me, I haven't forgotten and doubt I'll be able to any time soon.

Meanwhile, when something to this magnitude happens to your body, regardless of what others outside the bubble see, there are things you and your family deal with that they will never know or understand and it's often enough, that there's no avoidance or forgetting. 

my boys and their spare time

I found these videos on Chase's camera card.  He asked me to put all the pictures and videos on his iPOD, but this mom was very curious as to what the videos contained.  You know, a way of checking in on them.  Most were of them sledding this Winter, but some were just well......boys.

I have titles before each set to explain...my version of what I think they're doing.  I actually heard me yelling at them in one of the clips and then they told me goodnight.  BUT, they didn't go to bed.  They continued their video making.  Oh my...who knows what's next.  What an odd sense of humor when they're bored.

Video Here

IRS and the Doctor

Doesn't that sounds like a GREAT combination for the day?  That was yesterday's day.  Well, I lie.  The IRS has been my WEEK!

First, the IRS is arbitrarily selecting adoptive families' tax returns and sending them to their tax credit review department.  In my opinion, it's an utter waste of time.  They're spending $3 to mail notices to families to send documents that were sent in with the original 1040 and then having to disperse the funds anyways.  I mean, can you really lie about adopting a human being?  It's not like we said we made donations to the church or organizations or started a business or something.  We didn't even buy an appliance or car that qualifies.  No, it's an adoption!  So, after frustratingly calling the IRS Monday to find out if I could pare down my 23 page (yes 23 pages) fax to them and getting no where, Brian faxed it all to them on Tuesday. 

Then, yesterday after a long day at the doctor, I got yet another notice from the IRS.  My favorite, oh so happy people, sent me a notice to tell me that apparently, by their records I suddenly had only 4 children...not 5.  Ummm yeah....I'm pretty sure I've had this little man in my house for almost 2 years now and in my bed for 6 months.  Yeah, I know I'm the mom to 5.  I didn't miscount my exemptions.  BTW, I use TAXACTONLINE.com and it remembers me from year to year, so no mistake.  It filled out the additional child worksheet and little Jae was on that page all by himself as the front sheet of the 1040 only allows for 4 kiddos.  I called yet another number provided by the IRS and she asked me if I had my copy in front of me.  I said 'yes I do'....this is after I told her (when she answered) that I was so upset and frustrated with them at that point I was ready to cry on her.  She asked if I marked everybody's box and I said yes.  She said she only saw 4.  I told her the littlest was on another page all by himself.  She asked for his SSN and I gave it to her.  She found him listed a real, live person and said our child tax credit would get reinstated and I could disregard the notice.

You see, the problem with the IRS is that as they forward on your return for review, they only send the 1040.  They keep all other documentation who knows where.  My new notice taking away our child tax credit was issue on Monday; the very day I first called about the other 3 notices.  So, the oh so happy lady I talked to Monday took it upon herself to look through our 2 pages she'd gotten and send us a notice that we claimed incorrect children.  Uhhh....maybe you should have all the documentation before you make that sort of decision!  So, luckily, the lady on the phone on Thursday, was a much happier person, took Jae's SSN and put all the stuff in for us.  However, we still had to fax in his adoption decree (for the 2nd time) and a spreadsheet, receipts and canceled checks for all of our adoption expenses.  Then, maybe, if they feel nice about it we might get the rest of our return in the next 3 months.  The first 2 people I talked to on Monday sounded SO depressed and depressing.  They couldn't help you at all.  They actually read to me what I had in front of me; as if I couldn't read.  It wasn't at all answering the more specific questions I had.  As a government entity employee, I cannot even imagine being that helpful (not at all) with the constituents who call or write us.  I bend over backwards to get an answer for people that I would never be upset to put in writing.  These ladies gave the government (I don't care if it's local, state or federal) a very BAD name!

So the doctor.  Yeah, it wasn't bad as in bad doctor....just made for a bad day when it's followed by the IRS putting me in tears.  Not to mention I was dumb enough to start supper before opening that envelope I saw was from the IRS and then burnt 1/2 gallon of milk on the stove.  So bad I had to take a brillo pad after soaking it an entire day to get it off the stainless steel pot.  The doctor was just my annual allergy testing, but after spending over 2 hours at the doctors office, getting pricked over 75 times while sitting there with a 5 and 2 year old who'd had enough after 1/2 hour, I was SPENT!

March is over and April is here.  It's going to get better.

Korea trip update

Sorry, I don't really want to reiterate it here.

http://chaostimes5.blogspot.com/p/tickets-to-korea.html

8 and 5

That is the number of Gotcha Days we've had with our girls.  Kaelin has been home 8 years last Saturday and Chelsi's was 5 years this past Monday.  So hard to believe the blessings we've had...even if we don't come off that way sometimes.  We're human and your average family, so yeah we argue sometimes, but God I love them!

Chelsi had her Kindergarten screening yesterday.  Where has the time gone?  I'll have my 4th child entering school this fall.  I'm not sad or weepy over it.  Just in awe that we're at this point.  I'm proud of her and not worried about the person she has become, so I'm ready for her to go and so is she.  When we left school, I asked her how it went; because parents are not allowed in with the kids.  She confidently said "It went well.  They asked me a lot of questions.  I knew all the answers.  It was easy."  I cracked up at her no nonsense answer that exuded complete confidence in herself.  She does NOT get that from me. 

While we (Jaemin and I) were hanging out at school waiting on big sis we got to meet another parent.  I was in the office keeping Jaemin busy and one of the staff asked about his name.  No one can remember his name.  I guess it's just different enough that everyone wants to call him Jaden or something like that, but can never remember Jaemin.  So, when she told us it was neat, I told her it was his Korean name and we decided to keep it.  The other mom was sitting in earshot of the conversation and asked if he was Korean.  When I told her he was, she excitedly said "I'm Korean too".  We talked quite a bit while we both waited.  She had twin boys being screened at the same time.  She took a picture of Jaemin to text her sister and say "This is what my boys were supposed to look like."  They're half caucasian and she thought Jaemin was the cutest thing ever.  So after my teacher meeting they told me I could go get Chelsi.  The teacher talked to me as we walked to the gym to get her and she told me how she overheard Chelsi and the twin boys talking about being Korean.  Apparently, the boys had asked her if she was Chinese.  She told them that she was Korean and asked if they were Chinese.  They told her they were Korean too and the 3 hit it off perfectly.

By the time I got to the gym she introduced me to her new friends and she was SO excited to tell me they were Korean.  She couldn't wait to tell her dad too.  We live in a very small town with a very small school.  I couldn't believe my luck when Kaelin had 2 Asian adoptees in her grade and another Asian girl.  I didn't think we'd get that lucky again.  And now Chelsi has two little boys that are Korean!  Them being Asian doesn't totally define them, but obviously it's more important to Chelsi than she lets on.  She wouldn't have been so excited if it didn't matter to her just a tiny bit.  For that I'm excited!

TV Choices

I want to get rid of satellite so BAD!  There are no good options.  We don't get anything (no locals) without it.  There's no for sure that we could without a very large and high antenna because of the hole we sit in.  I know that in a lot of areas $110 for tv, internet and phone isn't bad, but sometimes it just seems so wasteful.  A part of me wonders if we didn't have many choices in tv, if the kids would study even more, etc.?  Can't help but think that.  But, at the same time, I think Brian works so hard and deserves his ESPN.  The only thing he really asks for. 

I signed up for a month of free Netflix to check it out.  Since Grandma gave us a Wii for Christmas we can finally try this out.  The kids REALLY like it.  So, last night I ordered 2 Rokus to go in the other rooms.  There are other things you can watch through the Rokus too and no price.  I'll find out after we get them.  I wanted to speed up our internet so Netflix wouldn't have to constantly retrieve, but I'm not positive the $10/month more it would cost me would fix the issue.  The phone company says yes, but not willing to guarantee it and allow me to go back to my 768 speed at my grandfathered in price.  We're only paying $53/month for satellite, which is pretty cheap....just still seems frivolous.  Of course, $53 includes a $10/month discount I talked them into until December of this year.  ESPN360 maybe offering something in the future through Roku or internet.  At that point, we'll probably dump satellite totally.  I can live with Netflix and the other avenues we'd have at at least a $20/month cost savings.  Netflix will be $10/month to keep, so not terrible.  I can downgrade our satellite one more notch and that will cover it.

What I'd REALLY like to do is get rid of satellite totally, but I really need to get our locals first.  You can't watch the local news live and I do think it's important to do that.  I think we're going to be stuck with satellite for awhile. 

Transitions

Every full moon Jaemin doesn't sleep.  He literally lies in bed with his eye closed, but don't be mistaken, he's awake.  The second I sneak by his bedroom, to go to bed, he opens them and starts to cry.

Last night I took him back to his bed.  He came to my room screaming, so I locked the door.  He went back to bed and stopped crying, but 1/2 hour later I could still hear him whimpering in bed.  I couldn't take it anymore.  I brought him into bed.  I don't know what happened or why he started sleeping with me 6 months ago, but he's really gotten to where he has to.  He flopped in my bed and sat up several times until after 11:30.  Somewhere in there, and I don't remember when or how it came about (I was WAY tired) I went into his room, got his paci and made him throw it in the trash.  I told him that he he wanted to sleep in my bed every night that was fine, but paci had to go forever then.  He's REALLY attached to his paci, so all I could think was 'I'm going to pay for this at naptime tomorrow'.

Tomorrow's here.  So far so good.  I doubt he'll power nap as usual, but he DID go to sleep without it.  He asked me where it was and I reminded him that he was a big boy.  I asked him if Cole had a paci and he said 'no'.  I asked him if Chase had a paci and he said 'no'.  Then, I asked him if big boy Jaemin had a paci and he said 'yes'.  I told him was all gone in the trash forever.  He laid down for a second, but when I walked back by he was sitting up playing.  So since he HATES his door being closed I told him to lay down or I close the door.  He's such a little stinker, he said 'close the door'.  It was only about 1/2 hour later and he was sleeping, so that's good for him.  We'll see how future naps go, but dang, if he's gonna sleep in my bed no matter what, I'm getting something out of the deal.

On the potty front, Chelsi has been dry 11 nights in a row!  Yep, after we moved back into the house, not one wet night.  We're on week 9 o f the 12 week chart that came with the alarm.  So, I have to say, I'm pleased with the alarm....all $110 of it.  I really do think it trains their bodies.  In the beginning, if she rooted around too much or cried in her sleep, I knew she'd be wet.  But, now she stays dry even then.  She doesn't even run to the potty in the morning anymore.  She's holding it longer all of the sudden.  Now, when she first goes down she does go often.  Some nights she'll get up twice more to go potty.  I guess just a final empty.

It just feels so good to get somewhere.  To think maybe some day we'll have no pullups or diapers to purchase.  I know it may be awhile until little man is trained too, so all in all I'll end up with about 15-17 years of diapers.  YIKES!  Oh well, what can you do?

Really praying for Japan

Every time you turn around their news doesn't get much better.  It's a sobering realization of what can happen to a very strong, developed country.  What I mean is you expect the devastation in Haiti to be bad like it was, but I don't know that you expect it in Japan.  Chelsi even talked about it the day it happened.  She said grandpa had been watching it on the news and he told her that Japan was close to Korea.  I think it made her sad.  I told her he was right and that it is, but it all went the other way and didn't affect Korea.  But, still they are Korea's neighbors....even if they sometimes have bad blood between them after the occupation.

I pray for all of the people who have lost loved ones and are now dealing with radiation in the ground, food, etc.  Sounds like it's higher levels than expected and that's a terrible worry.

Lisa

Snow to Sun

Today's a beautiful (though windy) almost 80 degree day.  Getting ready to take little man out after nap for some much needed outdoor run time.  But, before I go, I wanted to post a picture of the 4 big ones from this past Monday...yes just 3 days ago.  It was a day off school for snow (SNOW DAY!).  They were NOT happy at all since now it's encroaching on summer vacation.  But, I had just signed up for a free month of Netflix, so they had found Sandlot 2 on it and were quiet watching; all 4 together.  It was so nice.

Memories Forever

Or at least I hope they don't break and they last forever.  A few weeks ago I found these little stepping stone kits in LTD.  So I ordered 5.  The other night I mixed them and each kid made a handprint.  They decorated them with the little glowstones that came with them.  They are a little cheap looking, but still a great way to preserve their handprints at a particular point in time.  I love them in my rock garden.

2 years ago we got a huge surprise

Two years ago today, we got an email to call our previous social worker.  I thought for sure it was to let us know we had a package or they had contact with a birth mother.  When I called, I got the shock of my life and immediately shook and cried.

Two years later, I have Jaemin, here with us, in person.  While today and the last few days he's not been feeling well, so he's been, well, GROUCHY, I LOVE this little boy with my heart and soul.  I love hearing him talk everyday as he came into the living room this morning and Brian said "J did you sleep in your bed last night?".  Jaemin quickly said "Nope, I slept in mommy's bed."  His language has just burst!  He says anything and everything and makes me so happy.  He's become the biggest little lover too.  I can't help but think back to the days when we first brought him home from Korea and he pushed so hard to get away from me.  He hit me and scratched me and just shoved me away if I tried to hold him, hug him or kiss him.  Now, he does the 'monkey hold' as we call it.  If Brian, Cole or I pick him up he wraps his arms around our necks and legs around our waists and lays his head on our shoulders.  He rubs your neck softly with his fingers as you hold him and he loves to lay close.  He still sleeps with me every single night, but most nights it's not too bad and I don't mind.  I love knowing he's there.

Where has the time gone for my baby boy?  Before you know it, he'll be as old as his oldest brother.  Two years ago I knew nothing of this boy.  I was so scared.  I worried we were possibly going to mess up the balance of our family, then.  I was so worried about rocking our happy little boat.  Little did I know our boat wasn't full yet.  It's fully now and I'm so happy God made a way for us to bring him home and to spend our lives with him.  I thank God for him and that email.

In case you don't remember, here's the first picture we saw of him (and I was in love)!

And a more recent, even though I've posted it before.

Happy Birthday Cole!

My first born is 14.  He turned 14 earlier in the week, but we weren't home until later this week.  So, the spoiled boy got 3 birthday cakes.  Since we were living with one set of grandparents, they made him a cake and we had dinner with another set on his birthday, they made a cake too.  Of course, I am going to have a cake for my own child, so that was cake #3!  Where has the time gone?  I cannot believe in two years I'll have a driver.  Now that IS scary.

Chelsi says he must be one special boy.  She must be right!

Long Several Days

It's been a LONG several days.  The first 5 days spent in our basement with 7 people wasn't too bad.  We survived just fine.  Then we moved to the inlaws while the floor was being done due to the smell.  It WAS pretty bad.  We stayed there about 5 days.  I'm SO glad to be home.  Just to be home!

So, lets see...where did I leave off.  Seizure?  Yes.  Okay, I took Jaemin for his EEG yesterday and he did GREAT!  He fell right to sleep.  We have to wait 1 1/2 weeks for results.  I'm not too concerned because I still think they'll come back normal and it's related to his GERD.  It's going to be awhile before we wean him from his meds.

Wednesday Brian and I spent from 8am to 12 am the next morning moving furniture back into the rooms, cleaning, cleaning, cleaning, painting (touch up) and putting trim back on.  My closet doors still aren't on, but he'll do it this weekend.  They're too long now.  Thursday, I had the EEG with little man then came home to clean the kitchen (hadn't touched it yet) and found that both sides of our sink was leaking all over the place.  Luckily my father-in-law could come over and fix it up for us.  It will last a little bit, but the side with the disposal has about had it.  Hey the gasket lasted 15 years...pretty good.  Now to find one that will fit and replace it before it gives out totally at a REALLY inconvenient time.  That's the way it always happens.  My legs, feet and knees are killing me.  Brian is SO thinking I'm a big baby, I'm sure!

Tonight, we finally get to have Cole's birthday.  I'll post that later because his birthday should be it's own post!

Here are some before and after.  I didn't take before shots soon enough and all the furniture was already out.

Befores:

Afters:

My baby.....my baby

He scared the absolute life out of me.  I can still cry this morning just thinking about it.  The motion of what happened and his face keeps running through my mind over and over and over again and I just cry again.

We're not exactly sure what happened last night, but the ER doc thinks it was a small seizure.  Jaemin fell off the couch and hit the hard floor.  When I picked him up he started to scream and then stopped breathing, tensed up and fluttered his eyes.  Then he started to cry a little again, but then did it all again.  Because our big boys saw him look like he passed out on the couch and slowly fall he thinks that was the seizure and the way he acted with me was the post ictal (sp?) state.  The way he reacted reminded me of when Chelsi had her febrile seizure and they're biological siblings a couple of years ago.  I swear to God he scared the life out of me.  Because I wasn't automatically thinking seizure I really thought I was going to lose my angel.

He said there's a slight chance he really could have fallen asleep that fast and fell and hit his head and knocked himself out, but because of the distance and the fact that it wasn't a hard fall he doesn't think so.  They did a CT last night and bloodwork and said everything was perfect, which was great!  Now we just have to get an EEG when they open up Monday to be sure.  He said it's possible it could happen just this once and never happen again too.

Please pray for the EEG results.  I'm thankful the CT was clear and there's no tumor and no damage from the fall.  The EEG is the final piece to get an all clear unless it happens again.  AND PLEASE pray it never happens again.  I never want anything so scary to happen again.  He is my baby boy and I never want to lose my sweetheart!  I love him God...please keep him with me.

AAAHHHHH!

4 whole days in the basement with 7....count it....7 people!  It's starting to wear on us all.  But, we've been sleeping much earlier....but you wake up more often 'cause there's always someone snoring!  Just another 5 to go!

Had my lumpectomy thing today.  She said she was pretty sure it was a sebaceous cyst, so no biggie.  She said it was bigger than she expected, but looked pretty typical.  I looked down after she was done and it looked pretty good.  About an inch or so long, but desolvable stitches, so easy to take care of.  All in all easy.  The numbness is wearing off this evening, so it's starting to get sore.  Time for some Tylenol. 

Tomorrow we will attend Brian's aunt's funeral.  I'm happy she's at peace now, but she was entirely too young!  It will hit me tomorrow at the visitation.  I feel for her girls so much!

Pee Pee...BUZZZZZZ

Sorry, couldn't think of a better title.  My mom made me realize I haven't posted the potty results in awhile and since I know some are actually reading this to decide whether an alarm may be worth the extra $100 or not I thought I really should post.

It's been a couple weeks, I believe...since the last post on potty.  Tonight's the last night of week 5 on the alarm calendar they sent....or Progress Chart.  She'd been averaging 4 dry nights every 7 nights, which is great progress alone.  Then last week was only 3 and I started to wonder.  But, this week she's had 5 dry nights and 1 that it went off, but I'm pretty sure it went off for sweat and not potty.  I couldn't find any dampness in her undies and nothing in her pullup.  But, still...we'll finish off the 12 weeks of the chart they sent.  Will she be dry every night in the next 7 weeks?  We'll find out.

Praise God!

Cole's cardiologist called and told us about the MRI last week.  He said he saw nothing he wasn't expecting.  I asked him, point blank, if we should discontinue planning our trip to Korea in 2013 and he said keep planning it.  He thought that when he sees him next year he'll know he'll either have to do it then or it may even wait until after the trip.  Now he's saying he may be able to wait until after the trip.  He said definitely no more than a few years, but maybe more than a couple.  He said 11 minutes on the treadmill was great, so we're happy!

Our living quarters and storage

Here's our real kitchen.  We can still get to it, but you have to go outside and through the garage.  We won't be having suppers here, but at least if we must have something we can get to it.

Two bathrooms (and our closet, but you can't see it)

Here's our pillows and lovees.

Station to get ready in the morning (for us girls anyways).

Our kitchen and medicine area.

Sleeping.

All mushed together.

Testing, testing

our patience with each other that is.  The big boys are lucky.  They have a bedroom in the basement.  No major change for them.  But, the other 5 of us have moved downstairs into the basement to live for a little over a week.  Where's the little icon with the buggy eyed guy? 

We have STUFFED all of the furniture from the 3 bedrooms, living room and hallway into the 2 bathrooms and kitchen...and one thing in the laundry.  I think we can still get to our kitchen if we must, to get meds and such.  I did pack us a small kitchen for the basement though.  We have ibuprofen, tylenol and all daily meds.  7 cups with names on the bottom and a towel.  As well as granola bars and breakfast bars for breakfasts at home.  The other days we'll be, um, mooching!  I put aside a small budget for some sub sandwiches we can eat at home and then we asked the parents if we can come over to eat on certain nights while we do laundry.  And the bathroom, right now, is the ONLY thing that worries me.  Our basement bathroom is SMALL.  Luckily it does have a small shower too, so we can still bathe.  That's good, huh? 

So what's going on upstairs?  Hardwood.  Yep, finally we have enough to hardwood everything that's not tile or linoleum.  I'm really hoping Jaemin, Chase and my own allergies will be better after this.  We're hoping the dust will be less too, therefore creating less allergies for me.  I HATE having my house torn apart like this.  And the work poor Brian is going to have to do getting the trim back on and fixing the wainscot he put up 3 years ago because some of what we did won't fit with the hardwoods.  I know I'll LOVE the end result and be happy with less dirt, but just gotta get through this week of very low maintenance me.  I'm pretty low maintenance anyways, but I won't be fixing my hair a whole lot for sure.  So beware when you see me.  It won't be pretty....at all!

I'll take a picture when I have time...I'm sure there will be some time for that.  It's an interesting set up for sure.  Jaemin at least has his swing screwed to the floor to entertain him some...and God help us help him go to sleep.  He does NOT sleep well in places that don't belong to him.

Two days of doctors down

Cole is done with his workup.  Very painless and all done.  Results of the EKG and echo were no different than in July, which was expected.  We'll have MRI results and dilation of his right ventricle later in the week or early next week.  Still unsure if he'll have a good idea of when surgery will be off of that.  Not sure if we should plan to go to Korea anymore or not.  But, Cole and I had a nice day together.  Nothing says love like spending 11 hours with you mom.  We talked a lot and it was nice!

I spent today trying to get Jaemin's autism evaluation set up.  While I'm not completely convinced of it, the ped says he has enough symptoms to be concerned and he may just be very low on the spectrum...meaning very high functioning.  While we wait for his April evaluation we're trying some changes to his acid reflux med and giving him yogurt to make sure it's not a yeast sensitivity.  I feel like we have to do something in the next two months.  May as well.

I've been watching both of my boys so much more intently lately.  I'm waiting for Cole to suddenly go off, so to speak.  I mean when's he going to suddenly start having symptoms?  Is it going to be sudden like when he was an infant, or am I going to get some notice on surgery this time?  I have no idea what to expect and that's the part that scares me the most.  Jaemin, I just watch for anything he does that keeps him off the spectrum.  Cheering at anything he does...even though mostly he neurologically typical.  I find myself holding Jaemin more and seeing just how intense my love is for him and how lucky we are to have this little angel in our lives no matter what happens.

I'm the luckiest mom in the world!

Too many irons in the fire?

Just a saying, but I think that's where we are right now.  Unfortunately, with 5 kids, there's no good time for anything.  You just let life take you where it does and you try to respond rather than react.

We're coming off the 2nd week of Chelsi's play.  This weekend is it and we're DONE!  While I think she will miss seeing her castmates, we both very much need a break.  Too many late nights is doing me in and for sure her.  She acts like a diva and it's mostly lack of sleep.

Tomorrow, Cole has his big heart work up.  We'll spend all day at the hospital so he can get an EKG, echo, MRI and stress test.  Then, hopefully, in a few days they'll have a better idea of when his heart surgery will be.  I'm hoping for something, so we're out of this lost area I feel right now.  I know it's not a perfect science, but at some point they'll have to make the decision to do it before he has permanent damage to the right side.  It's a personal call in ways, but they will make it as a group of cardiologists in the practice and they have a formula they calculate off the MRI.  Forgive me because I don't explain things well.  This is all new to me since the previous doctor never ordered these tests and should have been so they could have been watching the progress of his leakage.

Next week....oh next week.  I'm dreading.  We're getting some hardwood done, so we have to move around furniture.  We just finished painting the girls room, which made them very happy.  It's the first time it's been painted in 11 years and was painted for Chase while I was pregnant with him.  They picked an orange color that's sort of like canteloupe.  Then, Kaelin picked out black and white rugs for the floor.  Right now their bunk beds and all their belongings are piled up in my bathroom on top of the tub.  I knew that large tub would some day be handy!  :)

I also have a quick procedure next week.  No anesthesia, just a local, but I'm not looking forward to it since the lump is fairly large.  A friend was diagnosed with breast cancer recently and after B talked to her about it she has been given the sebaceous cyst diagnosis first too.  I don't know when hers grew or how long it was there before she was biopsied and haven't had time to talk to her, but B wants it out right away, so I made the appointment with the surgeon I saw last year.  Remember the cyst, no it's an adenoma, no it's a cyst?  So, while it hasn't grown since they've been watching it for the last 1 1/2 years I'm going to have it removed.  It's probably been there for 3 years or pretty close to.  I guess at some point it grew, huh?

Then, after all that's over we can have our furniture back in place and resume living, right?  I'm always a little leary when we do something to the house of any substance or go on vacation.  We don't have the greatest track record.  The last house work incurred Brian a spinal cord injury the day after we committed and started and the last vacation ended up with Cole having an appendectomy 4 days prior and Chelsi a febrile seizure on the interstate in another state.  Those memories flood through my head and though I try to shove them out I can't help but be a little gun shy that it could recur.  Cole has a BAD habit of having surgeries on people's birthdays, so this heart work up worries me a bit.  He had his appy on Chase's birthday and his heart surgery on his dad's birthday.  Obviously not planned!

But, as I tell others who get worried or stressed about things, just try to breath and live your life.  Nothing's going to change what's going to happen!

Bullying's Normal

Did you know that?  I mean, yes, bullying has gone on for centuries and is a form of hazing, but isn't that what all the commercials are about nowadays.  I thought I'd seen Obama and other advocates on special service announcements talking about bullying being a problem and having no tolerance for it?  Oh wait....maybe they're only concerned if it's cyber bullying.  Yep, that must be it, because when now that my kid is getting bullied by the same kid it's 'normal'.  But, it's in-person bullying...not cyber.  So, this must be an out for a school, huh?  A kid can laugh at another kid for having a heart condition that keeps him from playing football and being 'cool' ( I use that loosely since no kid that acts like this is every going to be cool) or harassing a kid and pushing him until they say something hurtful to another kid....no that must not be bullying either.  Not according to our school.  Not one thing I could say deserved any time.  All I got was how normal this was and how many new students there were this year and how that's just going to cause some 'upheaval'.  Upheaval....that's what we call it?  My kid could care less about who this new kid is friends with ......they have no right picking on him because he's smaller and is being intimidated.  All I asked was for an 'out' for him so he could get out of the situation, if needed, and I couldn't even get that. 

No school has the right to make excuses like this.  They're lucky, for now, he's asked that we not do anything to the bullier and I made him allow me to ask them to put it in his record in case it continues.  But, if it does continue and they do nothing there will have to be consequences.  Sometimes the only thing you can do is call the Board of Education.  If I have to I will, so I hop the kid leaves my child alone!

See My Korea Trip Page

Slowly, but surely we're making progress on saving for our trip.  Another $100 coming soon. 

ACTION!

This was the big night.  Chelsi's debut in a play.  It's a very small Christian theatre and the count was 51 tonight.  But, that's good....let her warm up.  There are over 120 scheduled for a day next week and the theatre will barely hold that.

She did so great.  At the end the audience is allowed to come and talk to the cast after curtain.  I welled up watching everyone come through and shake her hands while they whispered words of encouragement to her.  She did tell the director, however, she doesn't care for crowds and didn't like them laughing at her.  I'm telling you.  You can't help but laugh.  She's so darn cute and funny!

One of her castmates' parents brought him candy and these little skateboards he likes as a gift for his first performance (in this play).  They also gave the same to Chelsi.  It was so sweet!  She has really bonded with everyone in the play and they all love her.  As soon as she walks in at night they all have to say hi to her and she messes with everyone all night.

As I watch her grow up I almost feel like Steve Martin in "Father of the Bride".  I just know that one day she's going to be all grown up and I'm still going to see her exactly how she looks right now at 5 years old.  I will wonder where the time has gone and how she grew up so fast.  Her and I just have a different relationship.  She's just so mature and aged.  You see this teeny tiny body, but out of it comes big words, actions and understanding.  She's an amazing little girl.  And I'm so proud of her!

Just wait 'til tomorrow night when the family comes.  Someone's going to be getting some flowers!!

Breath and Catch Up

I'm catching my breath tonight.  I've had a nasty little cold and Chelsi's in the thick of play rehearsals as it starts soon.  So every single day this week we either have her at rehearsal or the show.  And last night was LATE!  She was so tired that she nearly fell over standing up in the dressing room.  The director let us go after she finished her pieces tonight so she could get some sleep.  And I won't even go into how grouchy Kaelin was after last night.  NEVER again!  But, the big boys have to go with us to rehearsal tomorrow night because they need an audience to practice on and they want to make sure they can't move her attention.  So far she's done AWESOME!  I can't believe how good she is at it and concentrating.  She stays on task, even the day that one of the guys' 3 year olds walked on stage and sat beside her.  She just went on with her part.

Yesterday, we had practice for Chelsi last night, but during the day I took the little kids to Kaelin's class at school to do the Lunar New Year (Sol Nal) presentation we were supposed to do last week.  It was canceled because of the blizzard.  Yes, blizzard.

Kaelin did great.  She actually wanted to do this and asked the teacher for it.  The teacher gave us pretty much the last hour of the school day.  So, Kaelin wrote some things on the board in Hangul, we passed our Won, she wore her hanbok and then we talked about Korean culture.  Of course, some of the kids asked about adoption too, so I would quickly answer so we could move on.  They would raise their hands so Kaelin could call on them and we could answer their questions.  One kid said "Kaelin, you're adopted?!".  It was so funny.  One kid asked how they kiss in Korea.  Oh my!  One just wanted to know how old I was.  The teacher quickly diverted that one.  We brought our pictures from Korea and the kids just loved it all.  They asked so many great questions and then they all wanted a Korean name and couldn't understand why Kaelin had a Korean name and English name and they didn't.  Hmmm....me thinks this makes her the cool kid.  :)  This was a room of 2nd graders and Kaelin loved the attention and the time to share.  Her teacher was very interested in it all, it seemed.  The kids decided I should be a teacher and teach about Korea.  So funny!  I work with one of the kids' mom and she told me today that he was so excited when he got home yesterday.  He told her knows EVERYTHING there is to know about Korea.  How funny is that?

And, now I guess I should get back to my photo editing.  I'm taking pictures for the show.  Last night I had to do pictures for the cast that would be on stage for props.  They needed some antiqued pictures.  They turned out great!  I'd post some, but there are too many others involved and don't want to invade anyone's privacy.

Blizzard anyone?  This was 3 hours into it.

Alarm Night #10

So, last night was night #10.  It was dry night #3!  Doesn't sound great to some out of 10, but for us, it's huge!  I think the last time she had more than 2 in a month period of time was when she had a UTI.  She woke up and told me she was try because she was 'holding it'.  Great new concept, huh?

Jaemin has been trying too.  He's wet at night, but no biggie.  Occasionally, he is dry.  But, yesterday he was dry all day. It helps that he LOVES getting 1 tiny, little fruit snack (not a package) every time he pees.  So while he goes often, I figured it's reinforcing the habit to his body.  So, I make as many trips as he needs.  Brian said he even came out of bed at 9 last night to go potty again.  If we could get him to poop, that would be awesome, but he seems to have a fear of this one.  Oh well.... One thing at a time.

I always find it somewhat amusing from all those parental stories of the magically trained child in one day.  I think if you ask my mom, I was one of them.  But, out of 5 I haven't had one yet.  Kaelin was probably the closest, but I do remember the process taking close to 6 months, but she was done by 2 1/2.  Much quicker than ALL the others....unless Jaemin gets in here.  We'll see.

Random Thoughts

Can't think of the last time I watched a show.  I mean really watched a show without multi-tasking.  Or better yet....in real time!  Before DVR for sure.  By the time DVR came around we easily had 3 kids and had to just miss the shows totally.  Do not have time for tv!!!

Why do people immediately judge people in terribly hard positions without any regard?  I mean I know it's human nature, but it's so unkind.  I mean, why do we have to judge someone when something terrible is going on in their family, like a loved one is dying, injured, etc?  Why can't we have compassion and put ourselves in their place instead?

I know I thought I was so smart when I was younger.  I couldn't even begin to imagine that things were really going to get much busier, like the older more mature women kept telling me, as my kids aged.  Yep....got a TON busier.  So glad our kids are spaced a bit so you can catch your breath.  But, sometimes when I watch others add to their families so quickly, all I can think is; how are you going to feel about that when they all are in school and have loads of homework at night, all at the same time.  There are definitely some pluses to having them spaced just a little.

And, some of this just comes from watching others on adoption boards I belong to, over many, many years.  But, why do they complain about not being able to pay their bills; medical, credit card, etc. and then jump right back into adoptions.  I understand the premise of 'I'd rather have my child than the money', but that doesn't 'seem' even remotely responsible to me.  I mean you never can accidentally adopt, so it's a very thought out decision...or should be.  So, if that's the road you choose, please do not complain about not being able to pay your bills that SHOULD be paid unless your circumstances changed after the child was home.  I honestly, would adopt another.  I would probably continue our discussions to have another, if it weren't for my realistic worries.  Can we afford it in the first place?  What if it makes it so we can't pay other bills?  Should we expect anyone else to bail us out?  I don't feel that's right at all....in any way.  Just saying.

And one thing I can't stand is watching people with kids quit their jobs to stay home; disregarding lack of insurance and ability to pay any bills.  I completely understand those that have children with disabilities that crop up.  Finding care for those children while working would be near impossible.  Especially reliable, loving care.  Medical care is so scary for a child.  I completely understand the want to be with your kids.  You're talking to the girl who wanted it for ever 10 years before getting to go part time (even though temporary).  But, sometimes you just can't have what you want.  I've seen people quit their job to stay home, purely because they wanted to be a stay at home mommy and then put their kids on assistance.  Nothing, absolutely nothing burns me more!!!!!

Those are my random thoughts that sometimes pervade my mind as I drive alone to work in the morning or on the way home....or worse....during work.  :)

새해복많이비드세요

Hope everyone has a wonderful Year of the Rabbit.

We had a wonderful celebration with friends this past weekend.  Forgot the kids' hanboks....AGAIN....but still a great time.

 

Chelsi and her 'husband' C

The good and the bad of a slightly larger family.

Okay, so we're nowhere near Duggar's super size, but I wouldn't want that.  No matter how much I love kids I cannot imagine feeling like I get to give them the time they deserve.  Working or not.  But, we are still, in fact, larger than your average family.  So, sometimes I think about these things as other people discuss family size.

Let's get through the 'bad'.

-Much harder to get a hotel room without separating your family or paying through the nose for a large suite.  Most hotels will allow you to squeeze in 5 or so, but not so much on 7.
-We're on the line with vehicles.  One more and we either have to trade to get an 8 passenger van or get one of those big vans.  I'm definitely not driving one of those 15 passenger things and can't afford a trade right now on my van for an 8 passenger.  Not to mention, it's hard to have carseats set up in an 8 because you still have to be able to get through to the back row.  And I'm WAY too cheap to drive a suburban.
-There's only one empty chair left at the table and it's not really an empty chair since we bought two more chairs when we found out about little man.  You have to straddle a leg, which little man or someone will be doing after he gets out of his booster.  What the heck are we going to do when we get inlawed and grandkids?
-It's really hard to afford vacations.  While others talk about their multiple trips to Disney, per year, we find other avenues every few years.  And you have to get CREATIVE.
-Food is getting WAY expensive.  And since we both work (me part time at the moment) we don't have much time for a good garden, so no great ways to save money other than old fashioned being careful.
-Diapers for 14 years!!!!!!!
-People still say 'are you done yet?' and if you actually think about another one (one day) you feel bad because you know people are going to treat you like you're crazy.  We got that with #5....not that we plan on a 6th, trust me.

And now for the 'good'.
-Vacations are even more fun with kid at various ages and expectations.  No matter where they are or how simple they are.
-Imagine the family table and tv trays and people standing at the counter to eat in just 15-20 more years when we have 5 more kids and grandkids.  It will be loud and bustling and cool!
-There's always someone around, so you never ever get lonely.  Boredom is another issue with any kid.
-We are reminded more than most other people how amazing God is and how blessed we are!
-Look how many do overs we've had.
-After you teach them to cook and clean, it's really not that bad....though they don't seem to do these things on par with my OCD expectations, so I do redo.  Bad habit, I know.
-All the things, we as parents, are exposed to due to 5 very different personalities and interests.  I learn new things all the time with new activities. 
-There's a hug and a kiss somewhere.  You can always find someone willing.

I won't go and say others who have smaller families don't know the true blessings in life, because each decision to his/her own.  I will say we have realized money isn't everything and we're thrilled to have spent so much having and raising kids.  Of course, there is a fine line on that issue too.  Next post.

Wet Nights

And I'm not talking about the blizzard. 

Last night was as bad as night #1.  She got up twice with it going off, but by the time she gets up she's done.  Her pull up is soaked.  Again, use a pull up over the underwear if you don't want added mess and frustration.

I'm going to hold out.  I'm going to continue.  I'm going to give this thing the full chance.  Repeat.

Lisa

Day or should I say Night #4

She was dry.  It's probably been close to a year since she's had a month where she's been dry two times.  Let alone two times in a week.  No alarm going off means more sleep for me.  YAY!

Lisa